if you have ever seen rat race (and dont pretend you havent rented it 17 times before finally deciding to buy it. oh wait that was me) you will recall the part where cuba gooding jr steals the tour bus full of i love lucys. there is this one part where my favorite asian lucy says
"you wuined ouw whowe wacation!"
and thus in the young santistevan sisterhood, vacations are affectionately referred to as wacations.
i bring this up because i need a wacation. on my quest of self discovery in recent years, i have noticed a trend regarding a need for wacations and it is this: i know that i need a wacation when i start to get hypochondriacal (real word. look it up).
this week my right hand started to go numb and prickly and get really cold when im on the computer at work. normally i would attribute it to the fact that my arm is in the same bent position in a 60 degree office for 8 hours in a row.
not today. today i think i have carpal tunnel and i need to have surgery before my insurance runs out.
last night i couldnt sleep. i ended up eating toast on french bread and watching the most recent episode of glee at 3 o clock am. normally i would reason that it was because i drank 2 coke zeroes with dinner so that i would be awake for regina spektor (which changed my life. she is absolutely the most talented regina i have ever met.)
but not today. today i think i have a sleep disorder and i need lunesta.
now im pretty tired. my eyes cant hardly stay open so my contacts keep hurting. my face looks like death slapped me on the cheek and then ate me and then spat me out again. my skin and hair are dry and my limbs refuse to move. on any normal day i would suppose that its because i didnt sleep last night because i stayed up eating toast on french bread and watching the latest episode of glee because i drank two coke zeroes so i could stay up for regina.
but today is no normal day. today i have decided that i am iron deficient and i need some slow fe which is a slow release iron pill or i need to go to fuddruckers for dinner.
i could go on but i wont. ill simply deduce that i need a wacation. i proposed taking a cruise next week but my mom said we are not in high school and we have to be responsible adults and show up for work. so ill just schedule my carpal tunnel surgery, drink some caffeine, take my lunesta, and eat my hamburger.
(if anybody is up for NOT being an adult and showing up for work this week, please contact me. i will meet you in aruba.)